These are the things that I have floating around in my head that I’ve never been able to understand. Maybe you can help me out.

Why is it that while chemicals are at least half of the equation in getting a clean car, they are the 1st place operators want to cut when business slows?

Why is it that chains never break on Tuesday when it’s raining?

Why is that as I got older, my parents seemed smarter?

Why is it that when you try to be proactive and order a hydraulic motor for stock before one starts leaking, one will start leaking before the new one arrives?

Why is it that when you stay till 2:00 a.m. replacing chain that when you return to open the next day, you are greeted with a rain storm of biblical proportion that would have allowed you to replace the chain in the daylight hours?

Why is it that we have trouble getting staff to arrive on time for a sunny Saturday, but they will all be there before opening when it’s pouring on a Monday?

Why is it that we drive on Parkways and park on driveways?

Why is it that if you make a mistake and put a piece of new cloth in upside down, it is always on the bottom row of the hub?

Why is it that if you are closed for maintenance, with a service truck blocking the entrance and are standing in your trench surrounded by tools, torches, etc. invariably a customer will make it past all the obstacles to ask if you are open?

Why is it that your credit card processor craps out at your peak times, only to come back up right after closing?

Why is it that you call an orange and an orange but you don’t call a lemon a yellow?

Why is it that if you have a car come out of the conveyor, the car behind it is always the most expensive one you wash that day?

Why is it that car wash trash cans and dumpsters have been deemed suited to hold used engine oil, bedding, and various other large and or hazardous material?

Why is it my mind can become totally blank when thinking up article topics yet filled with every thought imaginable when I try to go to sleep?

I hope you enjoyed my tortured thoughts. If you have the answers, I’m anxious to hear from you…

Bob Fox has 30 years industry experience and is an instructor at CarWash College™. Bob can be reached at For more information about CarWash College™ certification programs, visit or call the registrar’s office at 1-866-492-7422.